How a Texas Grandmother Supported Her Gay Grandson During the Crisis
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In March 1983, the first magazine article covering Acquired Immunodeficiency Syndrome (AIDS) was published in Science83, a publication known for changing its name annually. This significant piece, authored by Susan West, came out just weeks before Larry Kramer’s notable article, "1,112 and Counting," which was featured in the New York Native.
As a gay teenager living in Laramie, Wyoming, I received this pivotal edition of Science83 in the mail just prior to my sixteenth birthday. I vividly recall my shock when I opened the envelope and read the cover. I can picture the exact spot I stood in my dining room, the light filtering through, as I hastily retreated to my basement room to absorb every detail of the article titled "One Step Behind a Killer."
My grandmother, who lived in Amarillo, Texas, sent me that issue. Born in 1909 and raised on an Oklahoma farm, she was 74 years old at the time and still employed as a medical secretary at the hospital where I was born. She forwarded her subscription to me each month, recognizing my keen interest in science, having previously appointed me president of my junior high Science Club.
Grandmom Cooke always recognized my gentle nature and even taught me to crochet. However, her decision to send me Science83 was likely coincidental, as she regularly forwarded her copies.
Self-Discovery in a Small College Town
Following the tragic murder of Matt Shepard in 1998, Laramie became infamous. My own experience as a gay man is deeply connected to my upbringing in this town, where I first disclosed my sexuality to friends at age 14, though I waited several years to tell my family.
By early 1983, I was secretly reading gay literature in the Coe Library at the University of Wyoming. I would spend my free time exploring issues of After Dark and Christopher Street, in addition to flipping through art books featuring gay artists and photography collections of nearly naked men.
During the years 1983 to 1985, I delved into works by various authors such as André Gide and Jean Genet, alongside short stories from the anthology Aphrodisiac: Fiction From Christopher Street.
I also explored nonfiction, including Vito Russo’s The Celluloid Closet and intimate writings by Allen Ginsberg and Peter Orlovsky, which documented their relationship.
In a high school class, we were assigned to read a Ginsberg poem, and when asked about him, I blurted out, “Yes. He’s a homosexual!” My classmates smiled, accustomed to my openness, while my teacher seemed taken aback.